TANSTAV part 7

We interrupt this chapter to bring you a special exposition of a species of monster.

There are seven different species of Fae Folk, known in human culture as 'fairies'.  Personally, the Folk object to that term, seeing it as degrading, and prefer to be called either fae, or the Folk.  Or even, heck, the Seelie and Unseelie Courts, though those names are pretty outdated.  There are two main categories: Dark Fae, which are nocturnal, and Light Fae, which are diurnal.  The only things they all have in common are pointy ears, and being generally attractive, which coincidentally are some of the only things humans got right about them.

Dark Fae are typically small, not exceeding 4 feet 6 inches in height.  Their eyes are much larger than most people's, and glow in the dark, sort of like a bizarre lemur.  All of them have a liking for sweets, and no matter how many they eat, they never get cavities, or get fat.  That is the extent of their similarities.  After that, there are four variations in coloring, personality, living conditions, etc.  However, their diversity makes them all the more impressive.

The most common variety (and the friendliest of the Folk in general) are the Yoons.  Their eyes are bright lavender-purple, and their hair tends to be on the red side, probably thanks to their spending most of the Middle and Dark Ages in Ireland, and the United Kingdom in general.  This has led to myths about leprechauns.  The hands and feet of a Yoon are disproportionately large, and have microscopic clinging hooks on them, like Spider Man, enabling the Yoons to cling to virtually any surface, and climb up trees, buildings, etc, like lizards.  However, the thing that distinguishes Yoons most is their miraculous healing powers.  Their saliva, when applied, closes up wounds, stitching together torn skin.  Their tears heal burns (and do wonders for clearing up acne), and their blood (which, incidentally, is bright green, and tastes like Granny Smith apples) cleans infections and, if swallowed, cures diseases, even the common cold.  Their sweat, applied once a day, acts as a salve for bruises and black eyes.  And their hair, when boiled and eaten, can protect you from malnutrition.  Basically, every part of the Yoons people have dared to try so far can be used to heal, making them walking panaceas.  Their only known defense is their bite, which has paralyzing venom.  It can take out anything, from a fully grown troll to a minor imp, and can last anywhere up to four days, depending on the length and power of their bite.  Doctors use it as a type of anesthesia in monster hospitals.

Cynes live almost exclusively underwater; they have both gills (in the sides of their necks) and lungs, and their hands and feet are webbed, helping their swimming immensely.  They all have bright blue eyes, and silvery-blue blood.  When wet, or at least damp, Cynes can teleport from one watery place to another.  They are just as good-natured and kind as Yoons, but generally are also rather shy, so they aren't seen as often.  They have often been mistaken for merfolk.

Thals are, more than anything, the basis for human ideas about dwarves.  They are dark-complexioned, stocky, pragmatic, and spend most of their lives underground (traditionally).  Their eyes are multifaceted, like diamonds, which can be rather disconcerting, so they mostly wear goggles or dark glasses in the presence of non-Thals.  Their blood is pure white, and when allowed to harden, it becomes a unique, flexible but indestructible metal.  Thals, like goats, can eat almost anything; though their particular favorite foods are flowers and pizza (don't ask me why, I don't know).  They can instinctively sense minerals, especially precious ones, like gold and jewels.  Thals can also call them out of the ground, and change their shape, or manipulate them in similar ways.  Personally, I think that is pretty darn cool.

The last species of Dark Fae are the Ghuls, and are the only fae that can really be considered evil, or at least purposefully dangerous.  In fact, Ghuls have been banished from the Folk's main home, as punishment for breaking one of their oldest taboos, and eating the flesh of other fae.  Over time, they have become feral, savage beings that rob graves, and live off corpses and roadkill.  This almost exclusive diet of decaying flesh has turned their skin a mottled gray, and their eyes mustard yellow with red flecks.  Their other not-so-nice features are black blood, retractable saber-tooth fangs (which are in need of a dentist, incidentally), and the ability to track any scent they find appealing.  Mostly Ghuls can be found lurking by highways and in graveyards after dark.  During the winter, they mostly hibernate in mausoleums (warning: under no circumstances should you go into a mausoleum during the winter, or early spring for that matter, unless certain precautions are taken beforehand).

There are only three types of Light Fae, but they are just as interesting and powerful as their nocturnal counterparts.  They are taller than Dark Fae, and often more pale. All of them are the basis for myths about fairies, elves, etc.

The largest species (numbers wise) is the T'sai (singular: T'sa); essentially, they are the elite members of the Folk in general, since they are the most direct descendants of Oberon and Titania, the original fae king and queen (see Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream.  Thanks to unrest during the French Revolution, they have long since retired from the throne, and as far as we know, are living in a condo in the Bermuda Triangle; after that, until the Council of Six was established, the Folk were ruled by their three children).  T'sai are able to create optical illusions; they are not tangible, only able to give off false sights and sounds.  However, that doesn't stop them from being snobs about it.  The only things they can't use illusions to hide are their eyes, which are silver.  So, on rare occasions when they are forced to interact with humans, T'sai mostly wear dark glasses or colored contacts.  Their blood is pale pink, which disgusts them, because it's so close in color to red human blood.  It's the only thing they dislike about themselves.  Like I said, real snobs.

Flori (singular: Floran), on the other hand, are decent Folk.  However, they like plants better than sentient species, and so are kind of reclusive, mostly living hidden in the forests and jungles, caring for growing things.  Their eyes are as green as the vines and leaves they help grow, and their blood is clear as chlorophyll.  Flori have a natural affinity for plant life.  They can make it come up anywhere on the ground, be it dirt, stone, or concrete.  However, they have never managed making plants grow in air.  Furthermore, they can bring dead plants back to life just by willing them, and giving up some of their blood for them.  But their coolest power, I think, is that they can generate artificial sunlight.  The way they do this is by absorbing real sunlight through their skin, so they can emit it in dark places.  When they do, it causes their skin and hair to have a golden glow, and turn warm.  It's quite pretty.

Next to Yoons, the friendliest species of fae are the Foni (singular: Fonin).  All of them have wings; they can be feathered, furry, or like some kind of insect.  Their eyes are golden orange, and their blood pale purple.  The Foni's power is shapeshifting.  They can become any animal they want, when they want.  Unfortunately, regardless of shape, their wings and eyes stay the same, so they need to be careful.  Fortunately, if they shift into animals with wings, they only keep the ones they already have, and can change them a little to suit whatever creature they've become.

All the Folk, except Ghuls and T'sai, have some degree of mischievousness in their system, giving them the desire to perform harmless pranks on others.  But all in all, they're a decent enough breed of monster.

And now, back to our story.