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Thursday, May 24, 2012

TANSTAV part 5

Chapter Two part 3

"How-"

"What-"

"Is she-"

The multiple exclamations of surprise all tangled themselves together like pieces of leftover fish skin in a garbage disposal.  The trolls and Harper all fought to get their words in first, while in the background Fleming wailed about all the paperwork we would need to fill out now.  Suddenly, Calla timidly raised her hand, like we were in school.  I shushed my compatriots, and said, "Yes, Miss Gardiner?"

"I'm sorry, but-what do you mean, I'm one of you?"

"It's like this," said Harper kindly.  "You're-well, you're a- a-"

I cut in.

"You are a mage, or magic user, and you belong in our world, where monsters exist, and can hide from the human race without fear of being found out.”

They always say that we should tell newly-discovered monsters the truth, and as honestly as possible.  However, I got the feeling that the others felt I had overshot the mark.  They were all giving me that "you've-put-your-foot-in-it-again-Wormwood" stare that I have become so accustomed to.  As for Calla, her eyes were nearly bulging out of her head.  She stared at my tie, which was the closest she had come so far to looking me in the eye.  I expected her to exclaim something like "What?!" or "Are you crazy?" or "Prove it!"  Any of those would be a natural reaction.  Instead, she nodded slowly, and said, "That explains a lot."

"Oh?"

I was shocked.  Monsters who found out they were monsters rarely, if ever, took the news this calmly.

"Yes.  It explains some things I can do."

"Like what?" asked Fleming, putting his oar in.  He had a pencil and notepad out, and was scribbling everything down feverishly, so he could blab it all to the chief back at headquarters.

"Sometimes I make things happen when I want them to.  I've turned myself invisible before, and once made an invisible shield to protect myself from- to protect myself.  I've made things move without touching them, and I have premonitions about things once in a while.  Things like that."

Yep, she was definitely a mage.  One of pretty decent power, too; nothing overly special, but still cool.

Suddenly, Calla looked alarmed.

"Did I do this?" she asked, gesturing to the surrounding wreckage.  I gave a nod.

"Then have you found my father?  Is he all right?"  She involuntarily put a hand to her throat.

I had figured out the identity of the corpse by now, and so it was with great trepidation that I said, "Yes, we've found him.  No, he's not all right."

"How bad is he?  Can you help him?"

I was flabbergasted.  This man had obviously beaten her up on a regular basis, and she was still concerned for him?  Maybe she had Battered Woman's Syndrome or something.  I took a deep breath.

"Kid...I'm not exactly sure how to say this...but there's not enough of him left for us to help."

It took a moment or two for the words to sink in; her eyes drifted away from my tie, and I realized she was looking over my shoulder, towards the corpse.  As she figured out what I was telling her, Calla's legs buckled, and she began to fall.  Instantly I jumped forward and caught her.  Despite the heat of the day, she had begun shaking almost apoplectically, and her pale face had shocked agony clearly written all over it.  I gathered her in my arms, and then started for the mirror, which had followed us here.  It could only handle two trips at a time, needing a couple of hours to cool off afterwards.  That would give me plenty of time.

"Wormwood!" cried Fleming, "What are you doing?!"

"Taking her somewhere else," I said calmly.

"You can't do that!" he spluttered.  "That's against protocol!  We need to take her back to the station, and-"

I told him in very explicit terms where protocol could go.

"You can handle the paperwork for me, can't you?  Thanks."

Before anyone could stop me, I whispered my address, and then stepped through the mirror.

1 comment:

  1. Definitely one of the strongest chapters thus far. For me, this is where your story starts to come together, where your world starts to feel a little more familiar and real. It's hard to explain why, but I'm going to try. I think the various characters' personalities are really evident in this chapter, especially in their reactions to Calla. Harper tries to approach the situation from a kindly healer's perspective. Fleming seems all about protocol, less worried about Calla herself and more concerned with the logistics of the paperwork required and rules to be followed. Tristan's reaction is upfront, blunt without apology, and honest. He also shows heroism/protectiveness at the very end. And Calla's accepting reaction to her own situation and Tristan's revelations is perhaps most interesting of all.
    I also like that there aren't really any info dumps in this chapter. It makes me, as the reader, feel like I've become knowledgable enough about the world for now. Obviously, there is much more to be revealed, but it's nice that during this chapter the reader can focus more on the course of the story than all of the background facts.
    I also do have a favorite section in this chapter:

    "You are a mage, or magic user, and you belong in our world, where monsters exist, and can hide from the human race without fear of being found out.”

    They always say that we should tell newly-discovered monsters the truth, and as honestly as possible. However, I got the feeling that the others felt I had overshot the mark. They were all giving me that "you've-put-your-foot-in-it-again-Wormwood" stare that I have become so accustomed to.

    Great writing!!!

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